A mother of three, known as Akanisi Lebaivalu or Nissi, is bravely sharing her experience to empower women caught in abusive relationships. Nissi emphasizes that everyone deserves a better life and encourages women to prioritize their safety and their children’s well-being.
Her message comes in the wake of a tragic incident in Suva, where a suspected murder-suicide involving a couple highlighted the severe risks associated with domestic violence. Nissi reflected on her close call with a similar fate, reinforcing her commitment to speaking out. “I had to do it for me and for my children. I was scared for my life,” she explained, underscoring her fear that remaining in an abusive environment could endanger her and her children.
Nissi’s journey began with a minor conflict that escalated horrifically when her husband attacked her. The violence increased over time, marked by physical and emotional abuse, which severely impacted her confidence. Societal pressure and a desire to maintain family unity initially kept her in the relationship longer than she wished. Like many women in Fiji, she held onto the hope that patience and respect might change her partner’s behavior.
However, the cycle of violence continued, reaching a point where she recognized that no woman could change an abusive partner. This realization helped Nissi find the strength to leave the abusive relationship three years ago. Filing for divorce transformed her life, allowing her to focus on healing and providing a better future for her children.
“I’m still healing, but I want other women to know they deserve better. They deserve freedom,” she said, expressing hope for those still trapped in similar circumstances. Nissi emphasizes that now, as a single mother, she is dedicated to ensuring her children have opportunities for a brighter future.
Reflecting on her newfound independence, Nissi urges all women in situations of domestic violence to act decisively: leave for your children, leave for yourself, and seek the courage to break free. Her story serves as a painful yet hopeful reminder that recovery and a better life are possible, motivating others to take the crucial step towards safety.
These experiences resonate with broader discussions about domestic violence, including insights from Shamima Ali of the Fiji Women’s Crisis Centre, who highlights the complex barriers women face when deciding to leave abusive relationships. Ali’s work stresses the urgent need for support systems and community involvement to address these issues effectively, reinforcing the important message that everyone has a role to play in combating domestic violence.
By sharing her story, Nissi stands as a strong advocate for change, promoting the message that it is possible to heal and thrive after abuse. Her courage inspires hope that more women will find the strength to pursue freedom and safety in their own lives.
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